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Your birth preference

A starting point for the conversation, not a contract

Your birth preference is an opportunity to plan aspects of your birth and consider the options available to you. It’s personal — there’s no right answer, and no template that fits everyone.

What your birth preference looks like depends on what you want, your medical history, your own circumstances, and what’s available at your maternity service. Talking it through with a midwife or doctor — and reading the information leaflets antenatally — gives you the chance to ask questions and find out more.

How to use your birth preference

  • Write it down — download our template (linked below) and tick or write your wishes as you go.
  • Keep a copy with you in your hospital bag and your maternity notes.
  • Share it with your team — the midwives and doctors caring for you in labour will discuss it with you, so they are aware of your wishes.
  • Stay flexible — you need to be prepared to do things differently if complications arise for you or your baby. A birth preference is not a contract; it’s a conversation.
  • Don’t leave it until the last minute — discussing it during your antenatal visits gives time for questions and adjustments.
BIRTH PREFERENCE LEAFLET

What to think about

our birth preference can be as detailed or as short as you’d like. Common things to consider include:

  • Birth companion — who would you like with you?
  • Atmosphere — lighting, music, who’s in the room
  • Positions for labour — upright, leaning, on a ball, in water; what feels right for you?
  • Mobility and movement — are you keen to stay active in labour?
  • Pain relief — both natural methods and pharmacological options (more in the accordion below)
  • Monitoring — how would you like your baby’s heart rate to be monitored, where clinically appropriate?
  • Pushing and the moment of birth — how would you like to push? Warm compress on the perineum?
  • The cord — would you (or your partner) like to cut your baby’s cord? Are you aware of optimal cord clamping?
  • The third stage — birth of the placenta — natural, or assisted with medication?
  • Skin-to-skin and feeding — your preferences for the first hour after birth

We recommend attending a birth preparation class with us to discuss these in more depth.

Pain relief options; what to know

Most people want to learn about both natural methods and medical options, so they have a sense of what’s available if their plans change in labour.

  • Natural and self-managed methods Hypnobirthing, meditation and visualisation; water (hydrotherapy / pool); mobilisation and changing positions; acupressure; heat (warm pack, hot bath, shower); TENS machine; massage from your partner.
  • Entonox (gas and air) A mixture of nitrous oxide and oxygen that you breathe in through a mouthpiece during contractions. Takes the edge off without affecting your baby. You stay in control.
  • Pethidine An injection (an opioid) that can help you relax and tolerate stronger contractions. Most useful in early or mid-labour. Less suitable late in labour, as it can affect the baby’s breathing if given close to birth.
  • Epidural A regional anaesthetic injection given into the space around the nerves in your back, to numb the lower body. Highly effective. Discussed in advance with your anaesthetist where possible — particularly important if you have a high BMI.
  • An open mind matters You don’t have to decide everything in advance. Most women change their mind at least once in labour, and that’s completely fine. Your team will support whatever you decide on the day.

Special considerations

A few situations are worth specific thought when writing your preference:

  • Have you been offered an induction, and how might this affect what you want?
  • Are you planning a vaginal birth after caesarean (VBAC)? Or a planned caesarean? What would make either feel more positive for you and your baby?
  • Do you have gestational diabetes?
  • Some women need an assisted birth (forceps or ventouse) or an emergency caesarean. Have you thought about your preferences if that happens?
  • If you and your baby are unexpectedly separated after birth — or your baby needs admission to the Special Care Baby Unit (SCBU) — what would you like to happen in that scenario?

There are no wrong answers — just questions worth asking yourself in advance.